Believe in the Peeko
by GoldenMewtwo
Summary: This is a parody, not to be taken seriously. A story loosely based off TyranitarTube's Extreme Randomizer playthrough on YouTube. Please note, this will not be a direct translation. There will be no Pokémon deaths and Thamill's team will consist of what I feel were the most important Pokémon he raised. Please, if you have not seen the series, check it out and support him first.
Chapter 1-Norman's Kid (Vs. Milotic)

"Thamill!" Thamill slowly opened his eyes as he heard his name being called. He yawned and tried to figure out where he was. Not his bedroom, that was for sure. His bedroom actually had a bed, not stacks of boxes.

Oh yeah, the moving truck. He was moving to Hoenn.

The door at the back swung open and he shielded his eyes against the light. Two Machoke started unloading the materials. His mom smiled in at him.

"Ready to see our new home?" she asked excitedly. He silently slid out and pushed past her. "I think you'll like it here." She said quickly as she opened the door. "I even heard that Pokémon battling is really different here."

Thamill really didn't care. He would've been much happier just staying in Johto. But no, his famous dad just had to decide he suddenly wanted his family to be near him again. After all these years, now he decided that.

"Come get me if you need anything." His mom called as he marched up the stairs. He flopped down on the bed as the Machoke started unloading things around him.

Why now of all times? Thamill had been supposed to get his first Pokémon in a few days. Now, he was stuck in Hoenn, and who knew how that would turn out.

He walked over to one of his boxes and pulled out the book his dad sent him. _The Extreme Randomizer: A Guide to Hoenn Battling_. According to it, a strange phenomenon had begun in the region many years ago. All Pokémon started to become unpredictable, developing random abilities and movesets. In made battling much trickier because type effectiveness became risky. For example, a fire Pokémon may have powerful electric type attacks it wouldn't in other parts of the world. Water types might use fire attacks, Ice types might use Grass moves, etc.

It made no sense to Thamill. Where he came from, Pokémon had understandable abilities and moves. Here, he had no idea what to expect. He'd been reading this thing for weeks and was still no closer to understanding.

As he tried to focus, an odd sound reached his ears. Almost like rain on the roof, but louder. And it continue to get louder as the moments passed. Finally, Thamill couldn't stand it anymore. He stood up angrily and looked out the window. What he saw caught him off guard.

It was hailing.

"I thought Hoenn was supposed to be a warm, tropical region." He said, running downstairs. His mom was holding the door as the moving Pokémon rushed everything inside.

"It is." She yelled over the noise. "This is most definitely not natural."

Thamill realized the hail was taking a toll on the Machoke. They were moving slower, carrying less. He rummaged in a box and found some potions.

"Here." He sprayed the Machoke, healing their wounds and restoring their strength. As he did so, a hand grabbed his arm.

"You there!" He turned to find a girl about his age, dressed in similar blue clothing to his. Standing behind her was one of the most impressive Pokémon Thamill had ever seen. It was red, quite large, and had an enormous ring on its back. As he watched, the ring split into two arms, which blasted steam, melting the largest hailstones to water. "You're Pokémon look pretty strong." The girl said. "Come with me." She pulled him along before he could protest. One of the Machoke reluctantly trailed behind.

"Uh, who are you?" he asked.

"I'm May." The girl replied. She nodded to her Pokémon. "And this is Volcanion." Thamill pulled free in shock.

"Whoa, hold up." May turned in annoyance. "You mean the Legendary Pokémon that carved the landscape of several regions and that hardly anyone knows about? That Volcanion?"

"Unless you know another."

"And how exactly do you have it?" he asked.

"My dad gave him to me a month or so ago." May answered. She turned back in the direction they had been heading. "And now he's out in this weather."

"So are we." Thamill pointed out. May ignored him.

"He said something about odd weather incoming a while ago and went out." She informed him. "We've gotta find him." She looked around at the pelting ice. "I wonder what's causing it."

"Probably a Pokémon." Thamill said. "I seems like one's Snow Warning ability got boosted to another level. Kinda like how Kyogre's and Groudon's do when they go primal." May nodded.

"I suppose that makes sense. Where did you learn so much about Legendary Pokémon anyway?" she asked.

"My dad." He answered. "He always worried about them. Said I needed to understand their power if I was to be safe from it." The Machoke poked him in the side and shoved a book in his hand. May looked at it.

"Is that what I think it is?" she asked. He nodded.

"Yeah, _The Extreme Randomizer._ Maybe there's something in here about Pokémon with Snow Warning."

"Hellooo?" A voice echoed on the winds, quickly snatched away.

"That's him." May said. "Volcanion, clear the way." Her Pokémon nodded and forged ahead.

"Here, ability list." Thamill said. "Ampharos maybe? Or Milotic? They both have Snow Warning here. Of course, anywhere else in the world…"

"Yeah, Snover and Abomasnow. I know, I've been." May sounded annoyed.

"Something wrong?" Thamill asked.

"Nope. I'm used to outsiders who don't like our region at this point." She didn't sound very used to it, but Thamill decided to drop the subject.

"So, uh, this isn't actually my Pokémon." He gestured to the Machoke. "It's just one of the movers."

"Do you have any of your own?"

"Last I checked, no."

"Then it'll have to do." She said casually. He looked at the Machoke and it shrugged.

Thamill continued walking with his head turned for a moment and slammed into something big. He stumbled back and fell on his butt. The Machoke stepped in front of him and hefted whatever it was over its head.

"Hey, you musclebound nut! Put me down."

"Great. It talks." Thamill groaned. May glared at him.

"That 'it' is my dad." Machoke grunted and dropped him.

"Thank you." He brushed himself off indignantly. "May. Norman's kid. About time you two got here."

"You know my dad?" Thamill asked in slight surprise.

"Of course I do! After all, I'm Professor Birch! I know nearly everyone in Hoenn." He spread his arms wide. "And I know you, Norman's kid."

"I don't suppose my dad ever mentioned a name." Thamill grumbled. Birch frowned slightly.

"Of course he did. Several names. Usually mine, right when he'd first see me." He turned and gazed thoughtfully into the storm, ignoring Thamill's raised eyebrows.

"You get used to it." May whispered.

"It's that blasted collar!" Birch yelled. A pained moan returned from the distance.

"Uh, sir, we kinda have no idea what you're talking about." Thamill informed him.

"You'll see soon enough, Norman's kid. Got Pokémon?" Thamill sighed in annoyance.

"No, I do not. Did my dad not mention that?" Birch ignored the question, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a small red and white sphere. A Pokéball.

"Use this guy. Just don't send him out until you get close." Thamill looked into the Pokéball and found a small red Pokémon, Darumaka. It looked up at him and grinned happily.

"He's a cute little guy." Thamill noted. "Probably can't take many hits though."

"Oh no, certainly not. A single, solid hit will probably knock him out." Birch whirled. "Don't let him get hit very much!"

"Got it. No solid hits. Right." He glanced at the Machoke. "You gonna help?" It shrugged. "I hope that's a yes."

"Take one of these too." May tossed him an empty Pokéball. "If it's a wild Pokémon, we should try to catch it."

"It's here." Birch yelled, before turning and diving into some nearby bushed.

"Oh, come on." Thamill protested. Above them, a shadow loomed out of the gloom. A serpentine shape, with long hair draped from the top.

"Milotic." May said. "Book was right."

As they got a better look at it, Thamill noticed something different. Around the Pokémon's neck was a metal collar, with two blinking red lights. As they watched, a piece of hail struck the Pokémon in the head. It cried in pain and the collar buzzed, pulsing with energy. The Milotic writhed at the change and fired an attack off at random. A glowing ball of pink energy burst from the Pokémon's mouth and slammed into Machoke.

The fighting type Pokémon flew back and slammed into the ground, out cold. May grimaced.

"Moonblast." She said. "Thamill, you have to fight it. Volcanion's too busy keeping this hail off of us."

"I can't." he protested. "Don't you see?" More hail hit the Milotic and its collar buzzed and glowed again. "That collar is hurting it every time it takes damage. There's no telling what might happen if we knock it out, or even catch it."

Before May could answer, the Milotic glowed blue. Water coursed along it, forming two pincer shapes. It lunged forward, forcing the two trainers to roll aside.

"Okay, why does it know Crabhammer? That doesn't make sense. Only Pokémon with pincers should be able to learn that move."

"It's the way things work here!" May yelled. "Can you do anything to disable that collar?"

"Uh, give me a sec, okay?" He knelt and looked into Darumaka's Pokéball. "Hey buddy. What moves you know?" The little Pokémon danced around in its home, showing off its skills. Thamill blinked. "Wow, that's…" He turned back to May. "I think I can work with this."

"Good. We'll try to keep the hail off of you."

"Forget that." May blinked. "We'll just have to deal with it. Can you guys distract the thing so I can get close?"

"Simple." Thamill smiled in thanks and started to sneak around behind Milotic. May climbed up on her Pokémon. "Okay Volcanion, let's send this ice back to the source." The Legendary stopped blasting steam and drew back its two arms. As several large chunks of ice fell towards them, the Pokémon swung its arms, smacking the frozen chunks straight towards Milotic.

The Milotic, perhaps having learnt that getting hit with its ice meant pain, wailed and fired Moonblast after Moonblast, blowing the big hailstones out of the air. Thamill decided he was as close as he was going to get.

"All right, let's go." He threw Darumaka's Pokéball and the little fire Pokémon popped out.

It immediately began raining.

"What?" Thamill grabbed his book and flipped through it until he found Darumaka. One of its possible abilities was Drizzle. "You've got to be kidding me."

The Milotic quickly noticed that its hail had been stopped. It spun around and swiftly located Darumaka, dancing playfully.

"Trying to calm it?" May asked. Thamill crossed his fingers, but the Milotic decided it wasn't having any of that. It formed another Crabhammer, larger and stronger thanks to the rain, and swung.

"Water Shuriken." Thamill ordered. Darumaka quickly formed several throwing stars out of water and hurled them, but instead of striking Milotic, they sliced through its Crabhammer, dissipating it and weakening the attack. Darumaka found itself directly under Milotic's neck. "Now! Dynamic Punch!" Thamill yelled. The little Pokémon leaped up, its glowing fist slamming into the collar. The metal shattered and the device flew off as the blow continued and crashed into Milotic, confusing it. As the Pokémon swayed in disorientation, Thamill drew back the empty Pokéball May had given him and hurled it.

The ball hit Milotic and sucked it inside. It wiggled about, but soon calmed. Thamill walked over and picked it up.

"Gotcha."

"Nice work Norman's kid." Thamill jumped at Birch's voice right behind him. The professor had brought the bush with him for a stealthy approach. "I knew you'd have the right stuff!"

"Thanks, I guess." Darumaka leaped onto Thamill's shoulder and grinned.

"You can keep him." Birch said as he located the collar Milotic had been wearing. "I don't really have room for the guy, and he seems to like you. Hmm." He examined the device closely. "Who would do something like this?"

"Dad, you know everybody in the region." May reminded him. "Who do you think?"

"Yes, yes I do. But I can't fathom any of them hurting a Pokémon in such a way. Particularly not one as beautiful as Milotic." He stuffed the collar in his bag. "Mavis."

"What?" Thamill and May both asked in confusion. Birch tapped his bag.

"Mavis. It was written on the collar. In cursive, interestingly. I think it was the Milotic's name." Thamill looked down at the Pokéball and the beautiful water Pokémon inside. "You should think of a name for Darumaka too."

"And we should get back to the lab, dad." May said. Birch nodded.

"Yes, and analyze the collar to see what it's made of. Excellent plan. Mind giving me a lift?" May nodded and Volcanion wrapped one of its arms around Birch, lifting him onto its back. "Many thanks. Bye, Norman's kid!" They headed off at a fast pace.

"Uh, guys?" Thamill called after them. "What about the…" They were already too far away to hear. "…Machoke. It doesn't have a Pokéball."

Nearly ten minutes later, Thamill staggered back into town with the musclebound Pokémon over his shoulder. He was panting and sweating, and had slipped several times on all the ice left from the storm before it melted.

"What happened?" His mom asked as he shoved the door open and collapsed. The other Machoke retrieved its partner and took him aside for treatment. Thamill rolled over on his back.

"I met some…" Through the open door he saw the sign on the building across the street. Birch's Lab. He let his head fall back to the floor. "…neighbors."

"That's nice. By the way, your dad called." Thamill closed his eyes. Maybe he could go back to sleep and wake up for real.

Yeah, because his luck was that good.

"And what does he want?" Thamill asked reluctantly. His mom poured herself a glass of water and smiled.

"It's about you getting Pokémon." She said. Thamill sat up.

"Well, that's the good news." He pulled out his two Pokéballs and released his new partners. "Mom, meet Damage and Mavis."

His mom wandered over to the Milotic and stared.

"She's beautiful." She turned towards the Darumaka. "And this little guy is Damage?" Thamill nodded.

"Believe me, he may be small, but he packs a crazy punch." His mom laughed.

"I believe you. We have to tell your father."

"Oh joy." Thamill muttered.

"Or better yet, you should go show him yourself!"

"Oh double joy."

"He's just a short distance away, in Petalburg City. Here, take this." She found a map and pushed it into his hands. "And these." She produced a pair of running shoes.

"Really mom, we could just wait until dad decides to come here to show him." He suggested as he reluctantly pulled the shoes on and returned his Pokémon to their balls. Because he'll probably never show up here, he thought.

"No, no, now that you have Pokémon, you should go out and explore the world anyway." She opened the door and grabbed Thamill in a hug as he passed through. "I'll miss you, my Pokémon trainer. Just remember, your father and I love you." Thamill nodded.

"I know YOU do." He pulled away. "Bye mom."

"Hey!" Thamill stopped in his tracks as he was reaching the edge of town. May rushed up. "Dad wanted you to have this." She pushed a red device into his hands.

"Uh, thanks. What does it do?" he asked. She laughed.

"It's basically an electronic version of the book you were using earlier. Dad thought it'd be easier to use in the heat of battle this way."

Thamill smiled. He was beginning to warm to his neighbors, crazy though they were.

"Well, tell him I said thanks. I mean, the book's kinda ruined." He held up the book, destroyed by the rain from Drizzle. "And, uh, if he learns anything about the collar's origin, give me a call." May nodded seriously.

"Right. We'll probably have something within the next day or two."

"I look forward to it." And Thamill was. He rather liked Mavis now that she wasn't going crazy, and hated the idea of some idiot sticking something like that on her. Whoever they were, he would be sure they were arrested as quickly as possible. May smiled.

"Yeah. Well, see ya." She turned around and headed back towards the lab, but looked back to him. "Oh, I didn't get your name."

"It's Thamill." He answered. "You might wanna tell your dad that." She laughed.

"Maybe. Well, Thamill, we'll call if we learn anything." She turned again and this time left for real. Thamill looked at his Pokémon and the direction she'd left in and a new sense of determination settled over him.

"Alright guys. Let's go meet dad."


End file.
